This is almost as bad as "Person of the Year: YOU"

Well friends, my hatred of John Mayer has grown to unmanageable levels. He is now being celebrated as one of the Time 100 People Who Shape Our World and this is what someone (clearly a fool) wrote about him:

John Mayer doesn't radiate courage. With his sunken eyes and a wardrobe you might generously call agoraphobic chic, his aura of passivity is an artistic achievement.

Jesus fucking Christ. And THIS:

His empathetic voice and emotional fearlessness elevate songs like 'Your Body Is a Wonderland' and 'Daughters' from pop ballads into more meaningful territory; give them half a chance, and during vulnerable moments, they'll be your friends for life.

Thats like saying, "If your boyfriend just broke up with you and you're drowning your sorrows in bottle after bottle of Boone's Farm and happen to hear one of these two shitty songs, John Mayer's sweet, sweet lyricism and salty rasp will capture your heart and tell you to put down the Ben & Jerry's and wash your hair cause, girlfirend, he's not worth it."

And finally (shoot me in the face and nuts. the "kicker," if you will):

...he knows that the blues are less about melanin than about truth and technique.

Melanin, MELANIN. Its like, "BLUES...not just for Negroes with a geetar." I mean, c'mon. Eric Clapton is like 65 or something. Wasn't this all said back when he was sunken-eyed and agoraphobic chic?

(Emphasis added to the quotes above, obvs...to highlight the grossness of it all.)